a little april may

you clapped for me
i heard you

a little light fading
left almost twinkling nothing
belief and hope and faith
and something that drains a sparkle
i was dwindling and sinking and tripping
and sometimes i didn't even notice the spinning
the blur was nice, and the way the colors mixed was just distracting enough...
then suddenly
the freefall slowed
and the movie lost it's rythmn
and the lines that i had loved and learned so well no longer came to me
and like a flipbook i stopped and started
until the reel stopped turning and i could
look around
and then your hand.
giving me a steady place to put my own
as i step out of frame and look around and see
what i didn't know was watching me
a pair of eyes that stood calmly, not judging, not remarking,
that kept track of every foot i fell
and with that gentle hand, took note of every frame
and waited.
patiently.
until the hands were sure my light could not be fixed alone
so hands and eyes together with great care to be unnoticed
slowed the frames
and held me from my spinning wandering dim
then watched me stand again

you clapped for me
i heard you
and my light slowly slowly
lit again

i read some peter pan today